1355 Valencia Apartment 6 Newsletter

The official blog of the official newsletter of 1355 Valencia Apartment 6.

Friday, January 27, 2006

Erratum: Easy Cheese, Not Cheez Whiz

The piece entitled “Guide to 1355 Valencia Apartment 6” mentions a culinary concoction nicknamed the “cheez sammich,” which is erroneously described as a sandwich made using Cheez Whiz when, in fact, its main ingredient is Easy Cheese. Both Cheez Whiz and Easy Cheese are made from Real Kraft® Cheese cheese food product.

Response from the author: The notion of making a sandwich with a processed cheese food dipping sauce—as opposed to a processed cheese food spread dispensed from a pressurized canister—should have stood out as egregrious and absurd to me, as well as to our fact checker, but somehow this error made it from raw copy to print without so much as a scratch of the head. Apologies to the readers, and thanks to Chris for recently bringing the oversight to my attention. —EP


Anonymous P. Colton Abernathy said...

I am distressed and alarmed by your brazenly irresponsible take on cheese consumption in this day and age. Millions of Americans suffer from acute lactose intolerance, and in this article, it is clear that your publication not only lacks any sensitivity to this growing national health concern but also actively promotes high-risk dairy-eating habits without one mention of prophylaxis using lactase supplements or even the simple option of abstinence. It is exactly this permissive attitude toward cheese and cheese food stuffs that will lead a generation of children to make some poor choices they may regret later in life, typically 1-4 hours later, when they suffer from excessive gas and protracted lower GI dysfunction. Is this the sort of perverse and grotesque world you are trying to champion?

1/27/2006 9:21 PM  
Anonymous Darlene Futz said...

It upsets me to see the previous commenter imply that my dairy-eating lifestyle is a choice. It is not a choice. I, along with many others like me, was born this way, and recent research supports the view that my lactose tolerance has a genetic basis. People who observe lactose tolerant lifestyles didn’t decide to find cheese digestible, and it’s about time that society at large accepts us for who we are.

1/28/2006 12:41 AM  
Anonymous LJ Dickerson said...

Once again the liberal bias in the media rears its latte-drinking, leather-pants-wearing, cheese-eating head. I’ll say what everyone’s too afraid to say out loud: ingesting cheese is deviant and disgusting. An estimated 90-95% of the human population is lactose intolerant, so it seems clear to me that having an intolerant relationship with lactose is what’s normal. To smother your beef in a gruyère fondue is to go against nature and God.

1/28/2006 12:41 AM  
Anonymous Josh Tamby said...

What is this? Nazi Germany? Last I checked, we live in America, man, and in America people can eat whatever dairy product they want as long as doing so doesn’t violate the rights of others or interfere with interstate commerce. Also, a head can drink lattes and eat cheese, but it can’t wear leather pants. Duh.

1/28/2006 12:42 AM  
Anonymous SFPunkChick69TattooGrrrl said...

this is SO stupid. don’t you people have better things to do with your lives? and who the fuck are you people?!?! FASCISTS?! i’ve been eating easy cheese and cheez whiz and cheddar and gouda and, yes, GRUYÈRE FONDUE since I was like twelve. SO WHAT? this whole thing is ridiculous. you people need to get jobs and DO something instead of sitting around all day arguing on the internet and making yourselves look like total idiots. as a matter of fact i’m embarrassed for you.

1/28/2006 12:43 AM  
Anonymous P. Colton Abernathy said...

SFPunkChick69TattooGrrrl is right. I do have better things to do with my time. I apologize for posting what has proven to be an incendiary initial comment.

1/28/2006 12:43 AM  
Anonymous Maura Tenderstone said...

No need to apologize, Colton. It’s everyone else who flew off the handle…

1/28/2006 12:44 AM  
Anonymous Edith Hauerklaus said...


1/28/2006 12:44 AM  
Anonymous Partario Fink said...

Uh, I’m sorry, but are people defending Colton? His post was the most polite, and therefore probably the most insidious, of the comments expressing a closed-minded, neofascist view of cheese-eating and cheese-eaters!

1/28/2006 12:45 AM  
Anonymous Gil Handbrow said...

When did the concept of fascism get conflated with racism, chauvinism, and lactophobia? I remember a time when fascism was just a political movement about dictatorial control and demagoguery.

1/28/2006 12:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi, sorry, late to the discussion. Is excessive gas really a symptom of lactose intolerance? I thought that was just a myth. Also, I heard if you wear a ring in your left nipple, that means you’re lactose intolerant, and if you wear one in your right nipple, then you’re lactase persistent. Is that true?

1/28/2006 12:45 AM  

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